NEW FUTURE! HERE I COME!

Well, I did it, I finally did it! I resigned last Wednesday, And I finish up work this Friday.

Then come Monday....

IM STUDYING NURSING FULL TIME!!!

WOOT!!! IM SCARED AS ALL HELL BUT ITS SO WORTH IT!!!

So just to let you all know, I may not be posting for a while anymore, cause without work, comes the almighty pain of no internet, and I certainly cant afford it if I am not working!

So it will be back to smoke signals and telepathy im afraid.

Wish me luck though my friends, cause Ima scared but excited and will probably be in for the emotional rollercoaster ride of my life.

Im going to miss the people I work with though, They were awesome bunch!

Anyhoo, must dash, I have to fill the heads of two lovely ladies with my job stuff, and I think one of them is about to cry with the amount of stuff she has to learn in 2 days.

Love you all and will try to keep in touch!

Lilly

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Well I'm still sore. Tried to play netball on tuesday, and made it half way through before I just couldnt do it anymore. My knees shook with the pain from my tummy seam.

But my loving mummy-kins said that I should be able to play now alright and that I should be playing so that my seam doesnt get all stiff and all that.

Hrm... believe my pain receptors, or my mum.... hrm that is a tough one, and I dont care who you are, you would be torn in this situation too!

Had Cherry over Sat night with Ghenkis for dinner and drinkies. She brought over her latest creation in Swarkophski crystal (or whatever it is called) IT IS B-E-A -U-tiful! if this doesnt win the Crystal park thing, We will all have the answer that we pretty much already knew... that damn thing is rigged.

Please oh please everyone, go to www.crystalpark.com.au and vote for Emma Jenkins "Indian Gothic Bridal" (number 39 at the moment, but it does change from day to day, cause they caught on to me just going to that number and voting..... these are some smart crystal people... maybe they have an all knowing crystal ball or something..)

It wont let me vote more than once for anything now, the bastards caught on to me... So I am using the power of suggestion to go forth and multipy the votes.

*Feel my awesome throbbing powers of suggestion*

Apart from that, im poor, i need to buy lots of expensive books for Tafe, and also pay for my Tafe course. and Resign.. oh yes... must remember to do that.... bwahahahahaaaaaa!!!!

Love you all

Love lilly
xoxoxoxox

I have seams... so I guess Im like a Teddy bear

Im back! I didnt die!! WOOT!!! Viva life!

The op went ....well. It wasnt what they thought it was (endometriosis... if you dont know what that is, google it... its not pretty)

But on the other hand, everything wasnt hunky dory either.

It was funny when the doctor delivered the news, at first i was like "HOOHAR!! its not endometriosis! I can still have kids!!! No more pain!!! IM NORMAL!!"

There was apparently a Pollyp (wikipedia it or google it, im not fussed) that would have been caused by something foriegn (ew) that they have removed which would have been the cause of my problemo's. So finders crossed that nabbs this in the budd!

but it doesnt stop there, then she kinda blahzayed out "but your left fallopian tube is blocked." Continue on with medical jargon...

And this was me "WOO!...wait, what? how can that have happened?"

"oh, probably from that infection we had to fix ages ago (that spawned from another thing ages ago that I will never speak of, and if you know, please keep it to yourself for my sake, thanks) continue on with medical jargon

this was me "......um..... cant this be fixed??"

this was her "oh... no...." Continue on with medical jargon

I was all like "wait, stop there, say again? my what is where now? it cant be fixed? so my left ovary and fallopian tube is what? for ever? like, permanently?"

this was her "oh yes, but thats ok, cause you have your right one." continue on with medical jargon.

this was me "..........................................................................*sqeak*..................................."

So I went from the most extaticly happy that I have been in my life, to so crushed that I wept unconsolably in a record time of.. oh... about 0.03 seconds.

Gotta love that bedside manner.

And I know, everyone has been telling me, "oh its not like you cant have kids, you still have the other one, this is nothing. At least it wasnt endometriosis! Lots of people go through life with only one and they are just fine."

To you, if you were male, I ask you, how would you feel if the doctor took one of your testicles? not quite manly now are we? Wouldnt feel right again ever huh? Feel like a tear is forming? yeah i thought so.

Hey, loose an arm, meh, thats nothing, you still got the other one... Lots of people go through life fine with just one arm....

If you cant tell, the fact that everyone keeps telling me that its nothing and everything will be fine, isnt really comforting me as much as you would think. A little the first time I heard it, but it sorta jades me every other time it is said.

But I've cried all the tears I wish to cry, Ive stayed at my mums and had her cuddle me, Mattie bought me an angel bear from the teddy bear shop that is so soft and cuddly it makes you wanna never let it go, and flowers from matties parents and their dog stating what a brave girl I am (that made me feel quite empowered...yeah.... i am a brave girl, arent i? *insert muscle flex*grrr!)

So thanks to all that sent me messages, and emails of well wishing, it was nice to hear your support.

I have had my four stitches removed now, and feeling a little sore, but should be back to as normal as possible quite soon.

Im off to have my cornflakes (aka - Lunch at work)

Love you all

Lilly

xoxoxoxoxoxoxox